"Lord, let me strive everyday to be as good a person as my dog thinks I am."

We didn�t set out to get a dog, it just kind of happened. Friends of ours from my office called us up one evening and asked us to come by. We did.

Now this couple has a thing for dogs and it seems they had just rescued a skinny black, 45-pound, 6 month old puppy from death. He had been sitting in his 11th hour when this couple had pulled him from that fate. Being they already had two dogs, they wanted us to take him home.

�How big is he going to get?�

�Probably not much over 60-pounds.�

Which of course would be the truth if you consider 95 �not much over 60.� As I said, we weren�t looking for a dog. We had just bought a new house not yet a year ago and dogs, especially puppies, break and pee on things.

�We aren�t in the market for a dog.�

�But this dog is in the market for an owner. See how he like you?�

�Yeah, well, that just shows he�s smart.�

�Good dog then, why don�t you try him out and see how it goes?�

Yeah, goddamn good dog. Why did I fall for that old trick? I never returned books I got and didn�t want from those damn book clubs either. Turns out we took him and made him part of our family. After all, good training for kids right?

�I need to put my dog down, can you tell me what that involves?�

�I�m so sorry to hear that. Well, we set up an appointment for you to bring him in. We lay down a blanket and the doctor will talk to you for a bit. She�ll then give him two shots. The first is a sedative, which will make him sleepy. The second is the euthanasia which will send him on.�

�When can we set up an appointment? Sooner is better than later but not today.�

�How about tomorrow at 2:30pm?�

�Fine, we�ll be there.�

What�s wrong with my voice? Why can�t I catch my breath? Fuck that�why in the hell are we doing this?

Because he broke the one rule no dog can afford to break. The one line they may not cross. He bit someone�badly.

�Sir, the room is ready.�

�Thank you.�

�The doctor will join you shortly.�

�Again, thank you.�

We had a guest in our house. She�d been there for almost 15 minutes before Solo went for her arm, then her hamstring. His tail had been wagging both before and after and didn�t seem to understand what he had done. He acted as if he�d done nothing at all.

We had noticed him slowly getting more jumpy but it hadn�t been that long since his last checkup where nothing had been detected. Was his eyesight going? His hearing? When we�ve been taking him for walks around the apartment complex, he was getting to the point where we�d never know if he�d growl or wag his tail at a passing child or dog.

�Are you sure you want to do this?�

�Yes, he bit someone�badly.�

�Have you thought about aggression retraining?�

�It was unprovoked. He�s not aggressive by nature. He lost control. We have two small children who someday soon would like to have friends over.�

�Okay, this first shot is a sedative.�

Number one. The first shot. He did not even notice it. He was leaning against my leg panting. Those who knew him knew his panting. He was licking both Sue and my hands.

It was only one bite damnit! Just the one.

No, it was not. He�d bitten the stupid cable guy who had stuck his hand in the door without being guided across the threshold. There Solo was just doing his job.

But a guest being escorted across the threshold was important to him. That had always been his key. Even when friends Solo knew very well crossed the threshold to leave, he would go nuts as if they were no longer friends. But it had always been bark and no bite.

Kids run in and out of the house all the time�our kids and others.

But THIS? For a bite?

I saw how bad the arm looked. Had it been a child�s arm? Had my child been visiting a neighbor and MY son been bitten in this fashion? With their smaller arms, small bodies?

But he LOVES the boys!

Yes, and they love him.

And he watches the house and helps us sleep well at night.

Until he does it again.

�He doesn�t look sleepy yet�

�No, he�s fighting it.�

�I�m going to give him another one.�

This is not the second shot. Not yet. This is shot 1.5 or something else. Not shot number 2.

He�s panting, leaning, and licking. And getting tired.

It�s not too late to stop this. It can all be a bad dream. He can still wake up as if nothing happened. We can take him home and love him to death�

He�s lying down now but not relaxed. We�re both scratching him behind the ears but he keeps shaking his head to keep the cobwebs out.

Finally asleep.

�Are you sure?�

FUCK NO! DON�T TOUCH HIM!!!

�Yes.�

�The rest is very peaceful. Are you sure you want to stay?�

Shut up BITCH and get it over with. Can�t you see I�m about to change my mind?

��yes��

My throat doesn�t work but my head nods.

Shot number 2 is a pink liquid.

Solo?

Buddy?

How many times have I asked you to please stop panting? I�d take them all back to hear it again�right now.

Remember when I said that dog�s are good training for kids? If you really care, they are your kids too. Well, I failed this one. I have two more chances to leave a legacy by training my sons well. To remind them that there are rules that you may only ever break once before your pay the ultimate price. How does being a rapist change one�s life? How about a drinking and driving into a family of four? Murder? Adultery?

My sons, I promise you we�ll get it right, okay?

Solo, I�m so sorry.

You were a goddamn good dog.

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