Hey, I'm busier than the rest of these guys who keep posting short stories (well, not really but...). I can't pick up the phone and talk with anyone right now without first answering the question, "has she had it yet?" First off its a baby not an "it." Secondly, if she had had the baby, would I be at work talking to your sorry ass on the phone? I am not a patient man but the baby will come when he is ready. Well, here is my short story that matches my mood right now. I've mentioned this before but it bares repeating, "I Hate Waiting!"
(Finally, Fezzik reaches the top.Vizzini quickly cuts through the rope with a dagger. Fezzik and Inigo peer over the edge of the cliff.)
Fezzik: He's got very good arms. (Vizzini comes over to look.)
Vizzini: He didn't fall! Inconceivable!
Inigo: (looking confused) You keep using that word? I do not think it means what you think it means...[looking back down] my god...he's climbing.
Vizzini: Whoever he is, he's obviously seen us with the princess and must therefore die. (to Fezzik) You carry her. (to Inigo) We'll head straight for the Guilder frontier. Catch up when he's dead. If he falls, fine; if not, the sword.
Inigo: I'm going to do him left-handed.
Vizzini: You know what a hurry we're in!
Inigo: Well, it is the only way I can be satisfied. If I use my right, over too quickly.
Vizzini: Oh have it your way.
Fezzik: (to Inigo) You be careful. People in masks cannot be trusted.
Vizzini: (impatiently) I'm waiting...
(Inigo practices a few steps. He then calls to the Man in black.)
Inigo: Hello there. Slow going?
Man in black: Look, I don't mean to be rude but this is not as easy as it looks, so I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't distract me.
Inigo: (apologetic) Sorry.
Man in black: Thank you.
Inigo: (Inigo unsheathes his sword and practices more steps. Calls again to the Man in black.) I do not suppose you could speed things up?
Man in black: If you're in such a hurry you could lower a rope or a tree branch or find something useful to do.
Inigo: I could do that. I have got some rope up here. But I do not think you would accept my help, since I am only waiting around to kill you.
Man in black: That does put a damper on our relationship.
Inigo: ...but, I promise I will not kill you until you reach the top.
Man in black: That's very comforting, but I'm afraid you'll just have to wait.
Inigo: I hate waiting. I could give you my word as a Spaniard?
Man in black: (struggling up the cliff side) No good. I've known too many Spaniards.
Inigo: Is there any way you'll trust me?
Man in black: Nothing comes to mind.
Inigo: (very seriously) I swear on the soul of my father, Domingo Montoya, you will reach the top alive.
Man in black: Throw me the rope.
(Inigo throws the rope to the Man in black, and helps him to the top where there's a clearing)
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